Seven years ago you wanted out of my belly. I had imagined what my birth experience would be like with you, but when that day came it was nothing what I imagined. My birth story with you is much like your passionate personality!
I had my ideas of what being a mother would be like. I had perfect pictures of patience in my mind. We would laugh, hold hands, finger paint, and never would there be any yelling.
Well, my passionate redheaded son, I had no idea what my life would be like with you. To be honest, I struggle with guilt. I am not very patient, their hasn't been much finger painting, and there's been a lot more yelling than I knew I was capable of.
The way I envisioned being a mother looked really nice, but it had no depth.
I know you don't understand this now, but I want to write it to you because one day you will know what I am saying. One day you will fail, like I have. You will disappoint. You will feel shame. There will be days when you wonder how others can love you when you make awful mistakes.
And that's when you will remember me—on my knees, once again, asking you for forgiveness.
I know our relationship has been bumpy, but without those bumps I would be a terrible mother. Those bumps are what we need. Those bumps remind us that we cannot walk this road alone. We need Jesus. He is the one who gives us all we need. When we fail, he will pick us up and conquer! When we lose our temper, He will be our patience. When we make bad choices, he gives us wisdom.
The last seven years with you has brought so much joy to our family. You are quick to love others. When you see a homeless person on the street you would empty your jar of recycling money in a heartbeat and give your bed for them to sleep in. We have seen you care for your brothers and sister in a way that is beyond your years...you have learned to put others before yourself. I have learned so much from you.
I love you Vitali, you are only seven, but you have experienced so much life already. You are a gift to all of us. The day you made me a mother was the most amazing day of my life.